The only app I’d like for Christmas is a “hAPPy holiday.”
I’ve adopted Santa’s strategy and only visit family once a year, and only if I think they’ve been good.
He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree.
Wondering if unemployment will be sending me a Christmas bonus?
I’ve got you on my “nice and naughty list!
Wishing you hit the jackpot for health, wealth, and happiness this holiday season and throughout the New Year 2018!
Microsoft has Windows, but Santa has Chimneys.
Keeping the list of naughty girls all to yourself? Well played Santa.
Merry Kissmyass with lots of hugs.
I tried writing one of those braggy, family Christmas letters,, but it just started looking like a suicide note.
Dear Santa, Please send your credit card numbers. it’s only fair since you’re getting the credit for the gifts, that you should start paying for them also..
In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall.
The real Santa Claus is at the mall.
If you can’t wrap Christmas presents well, at least make it look like they put up a good fight.
You are the reason this Christmas I am cocking more than I need; I know you are coming. Merry Christmas!