Microsoft has Windows, but Santa has Chimneys.
Keeping the list of naughty girls all to yourself? Well played Santa.
Merry Kissmyass with lots of hugs.
I tried writing one of those braggy, family Christmas letters,, but it just started looking like a suicide note.
Dear Santa, Please send your credit card numbers. it’s only fair since you’re getting the credit for the gifts, that you should start paying for them also..
In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall.
The real Santa Claus is at the mall.
If you can’t wrap Christmas presents well, at least make it look like they put up a good fight.
You are the reason this Christmas I am cocking more than I need; I know you are coming. Merry Christmas!
Dear Santa just leave your credit card under the tree.
I don’t always cut down a fresh Christmas tree..but when I do, I pick the best one in my neighbors yard.
Dear Santa, is it too late to be good?
Dear Santa I have been really good at being naughty…that should count for something.
Christmas shopping for dangerous toys. For kids I don’t like.
Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soot’s him.